I know its been a while since I last posted. Winter I go into hibernation when every day I yearn the feeling of dirt on my fingers and the sun's warmth. I dream of a greenhouse where I can nap in when the snow blankets the yard.
Its been a little over a year from when I started this blog. I've gotten so busy and involved with my mother's memorial garden that I didn't find much time to post. That and my own health which makes enjoying the garden much harder. I often wonder at the rate I'm going, will I ever get things here finished. I need to take constant breaks which makes me feel like I'm paddling against the current.
This year I feel like I NEED to finish it all. I never expected my time here on this property may be limited. Yes I always knew I'd be moving at some point, but I always had intentions to come back to maintain the gardens. But my father was diagnosed with lung cancer, he doesn't have many options as he has other health issues working against him. I feel this will be my last summer here. So I feel that I need to actually finish all of my outdoor projects.
I have asked myself if its even worth it. Why not just stop and not waste my time and money with the gardens. This bothered me so I asked my fiancé, and his answer was Yes I should continue. Even though we don't plan on keeping the property, my gardens keep me busy, active (as much as I can be), and it keeps my mind on the right track. Its therapy to me. When I feel miserable the sun changes my mood, anxious and the projects pull my thoughts away. It is much better than any pill. It keeps my mind strong with challenges and puzzles.
